Kyle.Kelli.Camden

Cereal, Baby!

2010-06-29T16:34:00.005-06:00

No not rice, but WHEAT! Camden had his first taste of solid foods today (well... besides the things that Grandma and Daddy have given him behind my back).

To tell you the truth, I think he liked the taste of his hand better than the taste of the cereal. I tried it (mixed with FORMULA mind you) and I personally hated it, too.

He loves his big-kid seat at least!

Note to self: Don't leave baby alone with open bag of popcorn.

2010-06-28T10:00:00.004-06:00

I left for only a second... shortly after, a loud crinkling sound was coming from the bedroom. I ran in to the room to find Camden pouring the bag of popcorn on his head. I don't know who was more excited about the spill... Camden or Phebes?

Happy FIRST Father's Day, Ky!

2010-06-20T11:06:00.003-06:00

He really is "Handsome like Daddy"!

We love you, Daddy! Sorry you have to be at work on your first Father's day. You work so hard for us!

All About Camden

2010-06-20T09:20:00.010-06:00

It has been a while... sorry, I have been too busy enjoying this little baby of mine. He is already 4 months old! It seems like any free time I get, I want to spend it with him. Luckily now with school out I have a little bit of time to put up some cute pictures of what has been going on these last three months!

In March we went to Vegas for a few days. It was nice to get away with the babe, Kyle, and Aunt Carli. We had a blast, and Camden even had his first dip in the pool.

But mostly he just relaxed in the shade of a lawn chair :)

Camden and Mommy had a fun mothers day. It was a lot better than the last one (which I spent sobbing in the back of sacrament meeting). He is my miracle.

Mother's Day weekend my friend Lindsay and I ran (okay...walked) the Race for the Cure. If you haven't done this before, sign up next year. It was pretty incredible.

He looks so big in his Hurley shirt! I love my little man.

Camden and his cousin Grayson are best buddies. Look at them holding hands! They do that on their own whenever we lay them next to eachother.

He loves his little elephant. It crinkles and has plastic feet that he loves to chew on.

He hates the carseat ever since we took out the newborn insert. I think that it makes him sweaty because it is vinyl. Poor thing! But he is a good sport after a few minutes.

Cam loves the bath, especially now that we put him in the real tub. He splashes and kicks like crazy.

If you want this kid to fall asleep, put him in his swing. Gotta love his little dino feet in this one.

He smiles non-stop! It melts my heart every time. I'm in trouble because I don't think that this cute face will ever be told "no" in his life.

His new thing is rolling over. Last week Kyle sat him down and we turned around, the next thing you know he looked back and Cam was on his back instead of his belly! We put him on his belly a few more times and he would roll over immediately and have this proud but confused look on his face. It is so adorable. Love it every time!

We got Cam this bouncer at a shower. He loves it, but instead of the cool toys on the toybar, guess what his favorite thing is?

The TAG! He stares at it and grabs for it the whole time he is in the bouncer. Maybe we should quit buying him toys. We have plenty of tags around the house!

You see, this is why I don't blog. I have been sitting here for over an hour. But at least now the grandmas can quit calling me a slacker :)

One Month

2010-03-17T19:45:00.005-06:00

My baby turned one month old yesterday...

Time crawled when I was pregnant, and now it is going by so fast! Too bad I can't slow it down and enjoy every second!This pic is a shoutout to Aunt Holly... she snagged this cute bib for Cam on her trip to Ireland last summer. Thanks babe! Happy St. Patty's Day!

I can tell this kid is going to be trouble ;)

It is sad that my newborn makes me look so pale... I love his cute pink skin! It is starting to fade though.

Camden's Newborn Photos

2010-03-10T20:39:00.005-07:00

Little Stud

2010-03-09T20:38:00.003-07:00

He totally has stolen my heart!

Stats from 3 week appointment:

8 pounds, 7 ounces

20 and 3/4 inches long

Cute as can be...

Camden Kyle Brown

2010-03-07T15:36:00.007-07:00

Camden Kyle Brown

Fenruary 16, 2010

12:43 P.M.

7.1 pounds

19.5 inches

Snug as a bug!

Daddy and Camden

Under the dreaded bili blanket!

Our new little family!

Camden and cousin Grayson

Kyle wants a shirt to match!

On the 15th of Fenruary, Kyle and I were walking around the Fashion Place mall. It had been a long day, I was very pregnant, and we were trying to get me to go into labor.

My phone rang, and on the other end, the midwife up at the University hospital asked, "Are you sitting down?" I said, "No... I am walking around the mall." She responded "Well, how about you come up here and we have a little birthday party?"

As it turns out, I was developing preeclampsia and needed to be induced.

We got to the hospital around 9:00 (after I took a shower, shaved my legs, etc.) and they started by giving me a dose of cytotec to see if I would progress at all with it. By 6 am, nothing much had happened, so they started me on pitocin. I got the epidural and took a nap.

I stayed at a 2 for a while, and then my water broke. I could feel a lot of pain in my back, so they kept turning up the dose of my epidural, figuring it wasn't working. After the third time of me complaining about the pain in my pelvis, the resident decided to check me... and to their surprise, I was ta a 10 and ready to push! I went from a 2 to a 10 in about an hour!

I started to panic at this point because I was thinking that I had a while to mentally prepare for the labor, and now here I was, with an oxygen mask on, lying on my side and trying to delay the baby until the doctor got there. Kyle was running around the room, getting the video camera, brushing his teeth, finding me my iPod...

The doctor arrived, and withtin 20 minutes and about 6 times of pushing, baby Camden made his entrance! It was so surreal to hold him in my arms finally. I held him on my chest while Kyle and I cried. I can't describe that feeling- it truly was a miracle and I will never forget that moment of our lives. Everything we have been through seemed to finally make sense. And did I mention how dang cute he is?!

It has been almost three weeks since our little dude arrived, I can't believe how fast the time has gone by! I have been pretty busy learning how to become a mommy... luckily I have had help from the best new dad in the world. Seriously, Kyle is a pro! Aside from the jaundice and being under the biliblanket, and a trip in an ambulance up to Primary Children's hospital (which turned out to be nothing), Cam is a healthy, adorable little dude. I just can't wait until RSV season is over so I can come out of hibernation!

I am still pregnant...

2009-12-29T23:28:00.005-07:00

...but you wouldn't think I was even excited about it if you looked at my blog! I admit, I have become a lazy blogger. Facebook is just so much easier! Here are a few belly pics (or as Kyle lovingly calls them, "fat Kelli" pics):

5 months

7 months

8 months

We can't wait for baby Camden to come. He is a little wiggle worm, which is so much fun... luckily he still has plenty of room in there so I am not uncomfortable yet, and his kicks don't really hurt me. Kyle is so cute and tells Camden every day to "just come out already!" I try to explain that if this were to happen, he would probably be the size of a small guinea pig.

Wiggles...

2009-10-12T20:57:00.002-06:00

I had been getting really antsy to feel Camden moving around in there. My pregnancy book said it happens between weeks 16-20 for most people, so for the last month I have been anticipating his movement at all times of the day, but not kowing what I was feeling for.

Finally on October 7th, the day I hit 20 weeks, I feel a weird little fluttering/twitching that was unquestionably him moving around! Of course, he waits for the last minute... just like his Daddy :). It is so much fun to feel him flipping around, and I can't wait to kiss his chubby little cheeks. But for now, I don't mind keeping him all to myself :)

Our 20 week ultrasound on Friday the 9th went really well. My favorite part was when they measured his little belly- like measuring out a little belt for him. The rest was kind of boring compared to the Fetal Foto ultrasound at 16 weeks, probably because it was more medical rather than for entertainment. But hey, I could stare at this little guy all day.

It's a BOY!

2009-09-20T21:29:00.006-06:00

I have been MIA from blogging... I guess I have a reason!

For those of you who have not heard, we will be welcoming Baby Camden in February of 2010, and we couldn't be more ecstatic about it!

We waited quite a while to break the news. I think this is because it was so hard with the first miscarriage, so we wanted to wait and make sure that this little guy was a fighter (which he definitely is).

I feel so grateful for the long road that we had to take to get to this point in our lives. It sounds so crazy to say it, but I don't think I would have the same feelings for this baby that I do now, had I not been through so much to get him here. I remember wondering why Heavenly Father would take away a baby from me so soon with the first pregnancy we had. That was definitely a trial of my faith, trying to comprehend God's reasons for the trials I was going through. Now I feel like I see his hand even more so in my life, and the life of little Camden. I know that without a Heavenly Father watching over this little guy, he probably wouldn't be able to grow from a tiny little bean to a living, breathing baby.

Although the first 16 weeks of this pregnancy were difficult (throwing up every day all summer), I tried reminding myself that the sickness means that the hormones are working... the last couple of weeks have been really great. One of my students asked if I was pregnant... so I guess I am starting to show a little bit :)

Cayman, we miss you!

2009-07-05T22:38:00.009-06:00

Seven Mile Beach

Hell, Grand Cayman

On the way to Hell, Summer was a little grumpy... So I told her to "Oh, Go to hell!" That made her laugh...

On our way to Stingray City, we stopped to snorkel. Yes, I can swim, but the life vest makes it easier!

One of the tour guides suddenly dove off the boat and came up with several huge starfish.

Me and Mommy Dearest at Calypso. I love her SOOO much :)

Don't really know what is up with my hair... But we sat here until I felt cold, so we moved inside :) Am I high maintenance?

Kyle gettin some love from the Stingrays in Stingray city. One totally sucked in his hand, it was the loudest noise! It could smell the squid he had just fed to another one.

All of the Stingrays stay here because they are fed. It is not a beach, but a sandbar way out in the middle of the ocean. They feel really slippery and come and glide up against you.

Giving the Stingray a smooch.

Kyle was loving it! I got out after they tipped over the bucket of squid and were going crazy. I don't want a hickey-leg like Car Car!

Friendly rays...

The balcony of the Sovereign... i'm sad that my parents are moving into their condo tomorrow. This place was so sweet!

Their condo is to the right, and the beach is the backyard! What a life, mom :)

Cruise ships port here almost every day. The beaches get really crowded.

The blowholes... I was trying to stay dry, while getting as close as possible for a pic... don't worry, of course as I get close enough for the pic, a huge wave totally claps me on the back.

Love Kyle and Holly's faces, and don't I look content?

That didn't last long.

Chillin at the Sunshine Grill!

I think this was one of two nights where I actually did my hair and wore something other than a swimsuit.

Kyle looks like a kid on Christmas morning. This is Singh's Roti shop. They make authentic Trinidadian food, where Kyle served his mission. It was really good!

Paratha and PearDrax, a good combo!

At the Turtle Farm... want to know why they have an actual farm? While they claim to introduce some to the wild, their main purpose is for Turtle Soup.

No, I am not freakin kidding! How disgusting is that? It is Cayman's famous dish. Yuck.

Heart Worming

2009-06-02T10:43:00.004-06:00

A literal quote from a student's paper, about Marley and Me:

"This book is a very entertaing heart worming book that shows the love for an animal is a great thing in someones life."

Last time I checked, heart worm was not entertaining :)

Excuses...

2009-05-28T11:14:00.004-06:00

My students kill me. I tell them for one month when an assignment is due, we work on it in class, but for some strange reason, they had a "catastophic" event that prevented them from getting it handed in on time. Oh well, at least it is entertaining. Here are some funny (and some not so funny) excuses I have heard today for late term papers:

"I had to go to the emergency room for stomach problems"
"I forgot"
"My mom had to use the computer last night"
"My printer ran out of ink"
"My computer crashed"
"I thought today was the 27th, not the 28th"
"If I buy you a coke, can I turn it in late?"
"I though that was for extra credit"
"Can I go to the computer lab to type it?"
"I didn't get it"
"I was too confused"
"I had to work"
"I have mono"
"I had girl problems"

and the day is only half over...

Life is Good...

2009-05-25T19:05:00.002-06:00

even when you don't get what you want. If I spent more time saying that, and less time complaining about every little thing that goes wrong, I would be a much better person!

One thing I have realized, you will NEVER have everything that you want in life. Once you get it, there will always be something else that you "need" to make yourself happy.

The little things in life truly make me feel good.

Like today, Kyle and I took a run, and I love how hard it is to push yourself to keep running, but how good it feels once you are done. I came in and collapsed on the couch until my heart slowed down, I swear I could feel the stress leave my body.

Then, Kyle went to work, and I turned on Taylor Swift's "Fearless" and belted my little heart out in the shower (I am sure the neighbors could hear me, but since we don't really know them, I didn't hold back!). I seriously felt like I was in high school again, in my parent's basement. Allison always used to play her music so loud when she was getting ready with me. I don't think I have listened to music like that since we lived together. Good times!

Yes, I have been rambling, but this is really like my online journal. And I want to remember how I feel today; a simple, relaxed, happy feeling!

Just for me...

2009-05-23T13:50:00.003-06:00

I knew that this past Mothers Day would be really difficult for me, but I felt I had prepared myself for it. Kyle had to work, and so I was at church alone, which is hard enough on a regular Sunday. The topic was a pretty sensitive one for me that day, but over this last year I have learned how to put on a smile and get through it.

Sacrament came, and went, and I held it together.

After everything was over, I felt pretty relieved, but as I was pulling out my hymnbook, my Bishop stood up to the pulpit. He said that although this day was meant for the praise of Mothers, he felt like he should acknowledge those women in our church who had not been able to bear children yet. I could feel the tears coming, and I tried blinking them back, but all of the emotions I had been holding back came spilling out. He read the following quote from a talk by Sheri Dew:

"Nevertheless, the subject of motherhood is a very tender one, for it evokes some of our greatest joys and heartaches. This has been so from the beginning.... Some mothers experience pain because of the children they have borne; others feel pain because they do not bear children here. About this Elder John A. Widtsoe was explicit: 'Women who through no fault of their own cannot exercise the gift of motherhood directly, may do so vicariously.'

For reasons known to the Lord, some women are required to wait to have children. This delay is not easy for any righteous woman. But the Lord’s timetable for each of us does not negate our nature. Some of us, then, must simply find other ways to mother. And all around us are those who need to be loved and led."

I know that God is aware of the pain Kyle and I have been through this last year. I am so grateful for what was said that day. I often have felt like there isn't anybody who understands what we are going through, which is probably very true if I only consider the people around me, but untrue if I consider my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. I need to be patient, and I know that somewhere on God's timetable, there is a place for Kyle and I to become parents. That day made me feel like there was something that needed to be said, just for me.

H-E-L-P!

2009-04-12T21:42:00.002-06:00

We got a new calling as Youth Conference Coordinators, and we have not had any luck in booking somewhere to stay. We don't really have any ideas of where we want to go. They want to go in August, and there are only 5-10 youth total that would be going, plus a few leaders.

If you have any good ideas, or know of somewhere we could go, let us know! We don't have any connections, so if you do, we would appreciate any help!

Good things come to those who wait!

2009-04-06T18:33:00.004-06:00

I have been checking fares for the last 5 months to go and visit my parents in Grand Cayman in June. They are usually around $580 per person, not including taxes!

I had been kicking myself becase back in November they were at $318, but we were closing on our house and didn't have any extra money, so I let them slide by.

Last night when I checked, they were only $307 per person! I ran in to our bedroom where Kyle was sleeping (he had to be up at 4:45 this morning for work) and in a frenzy screamed "Kyle-- 307-- i'm booking!" and grabbed his debit card out of his wallet.

I guess patience can pay off, but gosh it sucks to wait! Can't wait to see you mom and dad.

Are you kidding me?

2009-03-29T10:55:00.003-06:00

I just got done reading my family's blog... in Cayman... and I just had to laugh. While they are enjoying the sunny weather, we are experiencing "spring" in Utah.
Phebes is a little dumbstruck, too. She doesn't know what to make of this sudden snowfall.

And I am stuck at home, all by myself while Kyle is working. With a nasty cold and no one to take care of me :( Is there no justice? Can we please get some spring weather again?

We Thank Thee for... Elder Oaks

2009-03-15T20:52:00.003-06:00

I show up for our bright-and-early 8:30am church, and the parking lot is empty! So, I decide to head down the street to our Stake Center. An unfamilliar man with earmuffs and a long trenchcoat is motioning me forward to one of the closest parking spots.

I roll down the window and ask "Is this where Hunter's Creek ward is meeting?" He laughs and tells me that yes, Elder Oaks is speaking to us in a special conference at 10am. "You can go in and get a good seat if you want."

Since Kyle is fast asleep at home after his graveyard shift, I decide that there isn't anything better I could be doing at 9am on a Sunday morning, so I decide to go and get a seat. It must have been my lucky day! Elder Oaks came up to me and shook my hand. It was so cool to shake hands with such a happy man that is so full of the spirit. His words really comforted me. I felt like so much of what he said was directed at me. Ever feel like that?

I'm hoping that some good luck was transferred through the handshake! Too bad Kyle couldn't come :( I hate those graveyards, perhaps more than he does!

H-A-P-P-Y!

2009-02-09T11:14:00.005-07:00

For some reason, today is a happy day! The snow is falling, the parking lot outside is complete slush, but I can't wait to step out into the blizzard and go home to some chili and hot chocoloate (maybe not together, though).

February is a fun month... Valentines day, Kyle's B-day (along with his mom and grandma's), the annual Cutter Races in Jackson Hole... Maybe I just have some things to look forward to.

But I don't think that those are my reasons for feeling so good. I just think that I have learned how to be happy again. I am really happy with Kyle and the life we have experienced together. I am grateful for every experience that we have been able to survive together. I am so excited to see what this year will give to us! And if any of it is bad, well, bring it on! We are pretty tough!

I finally feel like a normal person, and honestly, I don't feel sad anymore. I feel like the future is looking up. Right now, I feel at peace with my situation, my life, and all that we have been through. And I know that this is the life I am supposed to have.

I want to give a shout out to some of my 'people'...

EDDIE just got a job with DISNEY ANIMATION! How cool is that? They are moving to Burbank in the next few weeks!

MOM, DAD, HOLLY, & SUMMY are all livin it up in Grand Cayman! They seem to love their new, diverse, tropical paradise. I can't wait to visit in June. I have had some good laughs reading their blog. It seems like it has been the usual Grampp National Lampoon's vacation... but we should call it "National Lampoon's Relocation"...

CARLI is in California, studying musical theater. WHEN WILL YOU COME SEE ME???

ALLIE & BOBBY, the only remaining family... we are glad that we weren't COMPLETELY abandoned in boring old Utah... yet...

What do you write about when life gets boring?

2009-01-18T21:52:00.004-07:00

I haven't posted in a while, and I decided that I know the reason why! Well, nothing is really going on in our lives! Our house is done, we are all moved in... cancer is gone :) ... and so now, what exciting news do I have to tell?

One good thing... Dr. Soisson, my oncologist, is the BEST Doctor ever. I wish he was an OB, but unfortunately he only deals with gyno cancers! Anyway, he told us that instead of having to wait 6 months to a year, we only need to wait 3 months. We were pretty excited about that! Now that I don't get chemo every week, I needed something CLOSE to look forward to. April seems just around the corner. I just really need to stay POSITIVE! No bad thoughts :)

I'm trying to keep myself busy with teaching, but I swear there are preggo's everywhere!!! I'm happy for all of them and their cute little bumps... but it is definitely a bittersweet reminder of what we have gone through.

At the same time, I don't know that I would change the things we have been through. I have seen that tragedy can bring out the best in a person. It surprises me that I can be happy, that Kyle can still make me laugh in the middle of a cry-fest, that I can have a really good day. At first, I questioned why God would give me a trial like this. I felt angry because I didn't think that I could get through it. In the end I was right. I couldn't handle this on my own, I had to become very humble and let God do the rest. I know that he did, and that is why the comfort and happiness that I feel today is possible.

P.S. YOU NEED TO READ "THE LAST LECTURE" by Randy Pausch! It is so inspiring! It made my 'stuff' seem so insignificant, which is probably how it should be!

Best week ever! Things we are happy about...

2008-12-24T10:13:00.004-07:00

1. FINALLY having our own house! We moved in on Friday and LOVE it!

2. NO MORE CHEMO! I was down to 6 on Monday and recieved my last shot.

3. Baby E is coming to town! Who cares about Santa when this little squish face of a nephew is coming on Christmas from Texas. (Oh, and we are excited to see Eddie and Mary, too!)

4. D-A-D... I haven't seen my Dad since October. His flight gets in tonight. What a good christmas present.

5. Christmas. There is not a better time of year. I love the Holidays, I love the music, and I love being with my family.

I hope everyone has a good Christmas, and remembers what it is really about. ( Yeah, we know it's not about new houses :) But hey, we are still excited, and that is okay, right??)

Tagged by Brit

2008-11-23T09:34:00.002-07:00

8

8 TV shows I love to watch:

The Office
Grey's Anatomy
The Hills
Law & Order SVU
Design on a Dime
Friends
John & Kate Plus 8
Ugly Betty

8 Favorite Restaurants:

Royal India (Chicken Tikka Masala)
Olive Garden
Cafe Molise (Where we ate on our engagement night)
Ruth's Chris Steak House (Only been there once)
Costa Vida (Mango Chicken Salad)
Pace's (AMAZING onion rings!)
Chili's
Robintino's

8 Things That Happened Yesterday:

Picked up Jess from the airport
Filled up my tank for $25! Holy Crap!
Made gucamole and frosting while my mom made pumpkin cake and cookies
Hosted Shay Crump's bridal shower
Watched BYU play their worst game EVER
Read about Obama's family in people magazine
Brought Kyle some food at work (at 11 pm... I hate sleeping alone when he works night shifts!)
Got into sweats and cuddled with Phebes

8 Things I Am Looking Forward To:

Getting my last chemo treatment
Moving in to our new house
Seeing my Dad and nephew at Christmas
Getting the green light for baby making!!!
Visiting my fam in June in the Cayman Islands
Finishing my master's project and graduating
Finishing my first year of teaching, so I can start over again and do it RIGHT next year!
Seeing Twilight on Monday

8 Things On My Wish List:

Visit Europe
Have the next pregnancy be normal, healthy, and successful
For Kyle to always be happy
Be able to influence my students' lives (unrelated to English)
A couch, fridge, table & chairs, t.v..... I don't even want to think about buying all of that stuff!!!
Another pair of Ugg boots... to go with everything that my black Uggs don't! (Kyle hates my Uggs. But he is the one who bought them for me!)
To be a REALLY good English teacher... right now, i'm just trying to survive!
To have people describe me as "laid back"... yeah right! I am a stress case.

8 People I tag:

Pee
Jess
Nicole
Allison
Erika
Shauna
Ashley
Mary

Grannies, Hair, & Chemo!

2008-11-18T11:21:00.002-07:00

My nephew is the cutest little baby! Look at all of his fuzzy hair! Here are my parents, now officially Granny and Gramppy!

A really sweet thought came to me... Our first baby was due within days of Baby E. I just know that he knew our little baby. I don't know why, but I feel like they were little buddies. Every time I see him, I think of our little baby that we lost and am glad that s/he had such a cute little friend to play with up there :)

Speaking of babies...

I had chemo yesterday... I am down to 347 for my hcg level. That is REALLY good (down from 1,500 the previous week and 68,000 a month ago... getting closer below 5). Once I am below 5, no more chemo and 6 months to wait until we try again! So probably June :)

Boston

2008-11-11T14:43:00.005-07:00

I feel so grown up! The English department at the school where I teach was sent to Boston for a conference. So, here I am! We haven't seen much, but I wanted to post a few cool things in the city. (By the way, it is FREEZING!!!!)There is a very cool Holocaust landmark right in the middle of one of the streets. This quote was engraved on the wall.

This is Paul Revere's house! Supposedly, he didn't really warn about the British coming... but he did go for a horse ride.

The city is so beautiful in its own quaint, historic way.

Another homage to Paul Revere... Kristy, Lisa, and I.

Mike's Pastries... The biggest, most delicious eclair I have ever tasted!

December 15th!

2008-11-09T18:36:00.003-07:00

Currently our closing date is Dec. 15! We are so excited to move into our new home :)

Aunt Kelli and Uncle Kyle

2008-10-29T09:43:00.004-06:00

We are officially Aunt and Uncle! Last night my sister-in-law, Mary, gave birth to Edward Layton Grampp IV. My brother is actually a Dad! Little Eddie is the first Grandbaby, and we are so excited to have him in our family! I just wish that they lived here, so I could cuddle that cute new baby!

My cute brother, a Daddy!

Mary and her little bundle of joy.

Like Kyle and myself, Eddie and Mary experienced several losses before having this baby. Looking at their experience really gives me hope, because I see that even when you have problems in the beginning, a healthy baby can be the end result! I am so happy for this new little family :) We love you guys!

Our Exciting Adventure at Huntsman Cancer Hospital!

2008-10-20T12:28:00.002-06:00

We sure had a crazy week! I will give you the details and try not to ramble on, how's that?

On wednesday I was taken to the ER at University Hospital because I was losing so much blood. I had a CT scan the night before to see exactly what had been going on in my uterus, so while in the ER I was told what the results were...

The cells from the molar pregnancy had grown back, and had turned in to an "invasive mole". Translation: The placetal cancer had seeped through the walls of my uterus. Also, the radiologist noticed some small tumors in my lungs, most likely stemming from the cells in my uterus.

While in the ER, I was given a test to see how much blood I lost. Turns out I was severely anemic; normal score is 40 and I was at 21. So, lucky me, I got to have a blood transfusion! (My nurse was pretty funny. I asked "How do I get the blood?" And he said "You have to drink it." :) I am totally Bella!) I got 6 units of blood; the scary thing is, you only have 8 in your body!

I then got an MRI to get a closer look at how far the cells had spread.

Then I was admitted to Huntsman Cancer Institute.

The next morning, the nurse helped me up, and I was bleeding worse than ever. The nurse was freaking out; even I hadn't ever seen that much blood before except on Law and Order! The oncologists came down and decided to do surgery to remove what they could in order to stop the bleeding.

The next day I got my first dose of chemo, and my adventure at Huntsman came to an end that afternoon. The good news is the chemo should kill everything within 8-10 weeks, and I won't loose my hair! :)

House Pictures... Finally!

2008-10-11T12:00:00.004-06:00

Headshot :)

Walking in to the Great Room, Nook and Kitchen.

Future Fireplace... and home of Kyle's "50 inch T.V."... (Unless I have anything to say about that!)

Nook/Great Room

Kitchen

Backyard view! We won't have anyone behind us... yet.

Bedroom... I'm so excited!

Covered patio that Kyle finally talked me in to... I'm glad we did this now, but I was reluctant at first.

Spooky!

2008-10-05T17:50:00.004-06:00

BOO!

Kyle's mom bought a Halloween ginger bread house for us to decorate. For some reason, Kyle and his dad are freakishly talented at decorating candy houses!

I don't know what is spookier... the haunted Halloween castle, or the monster with the crazy hair! Phoebe makes one cute Halloween Monster!

This picture made me laugh :)

The Exciting, the Sad, the Bad

2008-10-05T14:14:00.004-06:00

Because I have been teaching, I have not had a lot of time to post. However, there are a few things that are newsworthy that I need to share!

1. My Dad got a job in Grand Cayman island, and he moves there in a week! My mom and little sisters will be moving there in January. I am going to miss them so much. The only plus? I now have a new vacation home in the Caribbean!

2. We had our "Four Way" inspection (yes, that is what they call it :) on Thursday of last week. Everything looked great, and they will be putting up sheet rock tomorrow. Our house will be done in the middle of December.

(Once I find my camera, there will be a picture of the house!)

3. I had my HCG levels tested, and unfortunately they went from 6,000 to 18,000. NOT good news. My doctor is in Germany, so I will be meeting with her when she gets back to discuss what we do next. My body has probably made more molar tissue. (see previous posts).

In a nutshell, our lives right now are full of surprises. I just keep telling myself that everything happens for a reason, but sometimes it feels more random than planned!

Shoes, handbags, and free shipping...OH MY!

2008-09-19T12:02:00.003-06:00

If you like shoes and handbags as much as I do, then you HAVE to go to this website.

www.endless.com

They have thousands of shoes and handbags, both cheap and expensive. Also, they offer FREE OVERNIGHT SHIPPING on most items!

And, you can search in the coolest ways. When you find a shoe you like, you can zoom in and see a perfect, up-close picture of it. Also, you can return a shoe for UP TO 1 YEAR after you buy it!

Sorry Nordstrom, your customer service has been beaten!

And the magic number is...

2008-09-19T11:40:00.003-06:00

3,000! My HCG levels were only at 3,000 on Tuesday. For some perspective, pre-surgery they were at 350,000! So they have dropped A TON in the last two weeks. And like I said in the last post... I need to get to ZERO and stay at ZERO before we can even think about conceiving... so I am getting closer! :) Good news!

Time to start waiting...

2008-09-16T12:40:00.004-06:00

Today I had a doctors appointment and was told that I in fact had a Molar pregnancy. This means that an egg was fertilized, but for some reason it did not contain any genetic information. My body started growing molar tissue, and as a result my HCG (pregnancy hormone) levels skyrocketed into the 300,000's. In a normal pregnancy, I should have only been around 30,000.

Unfortunately, after you have this kind of pregnancy, you can't get pregnant for a while. I have to get my blood drawn every week to make sure my HCG levels are going down. If they rise, or stay the same, this means that my body is making more Molar tissue. This is why we can't get pregnant right now, because if we were, my HCG levels would go up. If my levels went up, we couldn't be sure if it was because of the molar tissue or because I was actually pregnant. If my body makes more of the tissue, it can turn into cancer. But I have decided that this is NOT going to happen to me :)

Once I get to "zero" HCG level, then we have to wait six months before we even try getting pregnant again. This is sad for us, but I guess that I can have something to look forward to: getting to zero and then staying at zero for six months! I will let everyone know once I am at zero!

In Remembrance...

2008-09-10T22:24:00.003-06:00

I will never forget this day. I was a sophomore in high school. I can still remember going to my 1st period math class and watching the tragedy live on CNN. It was the first time that I realized my freedom and safety was not inherently given to me, it was something that our country fights to protect every day.

As I was remembering September 11th, I realized that when the attacks of September 11th occurred, I was the exact same age as my students that I teach are now... I am showing this to my students tomorrow in remembrance of September 11th. Go to this website:

http://www.woodyulmer.com/prayer.html

It made me cry.

A rough week

2008-09-06T21:20:00.004-06:00

I want to express how much I love Kyle and both our families.

This past week we went through another miscarriage and I had to have surgery as this pregnancy was possibly a 'molar pregnancy', a very rare but life-threatening occurrence.

Sometimes it is hard for me to understand why things like this happen. I never thought that we would be one of "those" couples that have a hard time conceiving a healthy baby.

One thing I know for certain, you really do grow closer together when life breaks you down. I really don't believe that god makes things like this happen, but I do think that he is the reason you make it through.

Thank you Kyle for all of your blessings, prayers, and for letting me keep you up late while I cry it out. When we do finally have kids, I know that all of this will feel like it was worth it, and our kids will be lucky to have a strong dad like you :)

Happy Anniversary

2008-08-17T09:36:00.006-06:00

August 16th was our 2 year anniversary. I can't believe it has already been that long, it feels like we are still newlyweds!

I want to write down some of my favorite things about Ky, and also share some random pictures of us:

1. He leaves really early every morning for work (5:15 am), but he gets up early enough so that he can cuddle with me for a few minutes before he has to go. He always puts a blanket over me so I don't get cold, too! ( I know it is cheesy, but true and so cute!)

2. He sings in the shower, and he is really good! I sneak in and listen to him sometimes.

3. He knows everything about sports, and not just the basics. Ask him where a new player for BYU went to high school, ask him where all the Jazz players have played, and he has an answer for you.

4. He has a lot of random knowledge. I am like a little kid always asking him questions, and he somehow always knows the answer.

5. Kyle loves kids! When we were dating, we used to babysit his little cousins for FUN! Little kids love him, too. I always knew he would be such a good dad, which is one reason I wanted to marry him. I can't wait until we have our own (except it will suck that I am never going to be the favorite, with him around!)

6. It is really hard to be in a bad mood around him. He can always make me laugh. Even when I am trying to be grumpy, he somehow gets me to smile :)

7. Kyle is such a hard worker. Everything he does, he does it 110%. I wish that I could work as hard as he does, but I just don't have that kind of work ethic!

Love you, Ky! Happy Anniversary!

Home Sweet Hole

2008-08-07T13:01:00.005-06:00

We had our final meeting with our home builder on Tuesday, and the next thing you know... Viola! They are digging! I drove by today to check it out.

Luckily the team was hard at work! I think the guy was a little wierded out that I was snapping pictures of him digging, but I am so excited so I don't really care if he thinks I am crazy. Here is the sight of our future home, which will hopefully be finished by Christmas!

In other news...

I finally got my Twilight book in the mail today! I preordered it a few months ago, and it just barely came. So now I will probably be hibernating for the next week while I read the book (sorry babe!).

And for all of you Jacob lovers out there... I am going to make a T-Shirt that says:

Team Edward
Just to spite you!

Allie and Bobby's Wedding

2008-07-31T09:46:00.009-06:00

My big sis Allie married Bobby on July 25, 2008 in the Salt Lake Temple. It was so much fun to be able to watch them get sealed! She usually does everything before me, but this time we switched. I am so happy for them!

My cute sister Carli got to come home for the wedding (the one right next to me). She lives in NYC and is attending AMDA, a musical theatre school. We got a pic of all the sisters, and our Daddy of course, at the wedding dinner. What a lucky Dad, see how many weddings he still has left to pay for?

I love my cute hubbie. He is so much fun to look at because he is so H-O-T! We had fun at Tuscany for the rehearsal dinner the night before.

After waiting a while for both of them to get changed, Mr. and Mrs. Bobby Bourne make their grand entrance!

Allie and her best friend Erika. Allie's hair was so pretty!

Allie with Bobby's Grandpa. She has married into a really great family!

Erika and Bria

The K Brown Fam!

We used to be the Grampp girls... not anymore by name, but ALWAYS by heart!

The Grampps, Browns and Bournes!

Dancing with her Dad

Kelli, Summer, Holly, Cheyanne, Mom, Mary, and Carli. Mary is 6 months pregnant! You can't even tell. Her dress hides her cute little bump.

Summer thought this was HILARIOUS! Goofin off in the brides room... Made entirely of mirrors.

A long, sweaty day... We let the groomsmen come into the bride's room and drink our cold drinks!

Don't worry, it is water, not alcohol... Some of the fanciest water I have ever seen.

I was obsessed with the dessersts. I had about 20 of the little chocolate raspberry mandarin orange truffles. They were amazing.

Kyle and his mom

Dancing...

Cake fight!

Sending them off with some fire!

The bride and groom are gone... but the party is just starting!

John Mayer and Colbie Caillat Concert

2008-07-22T18:53:00.004-06:00

Last night I went to the John Mayer concert with my sisters and my parents. We had a lot of fun! I feel like I never get to see them because i'm not in Draper anymore :(

Me and my cute little sister Holly... We used to look alike until she dyed her hair dark.

Cute little Summer came, too. She likes John Mayer... but she was worried about all the boozers around us. When John Mayer dropped the F-Bomb twice, she wasn't too happy aboout that, either.

Oh, Sum Sum... she never smiles!

Me and my mom... just listening to Colbie Caillat! She performed before John and I was almost as excited for her as I was for John!

The girls just being goofs... There is my sister Allie in the bottom right corner. A little more serious than us goofballs. She didn't want to take part in the photo-op.

Maybe we were supposed to make a wierd face? My mom and I must have missed the memo.

My cute dad is used to being outnumbered by girls. Too bad Kyle was being a party pooper because he "Hates John Mayer". Yeah I know, he is crazy. Why can't he see the appeal of a sexy guy singing and playing the guitar???

Summer jammin out on her air guitar... imitating both John Mayer and the drunk chick in front of us who danced the ENTIRE time like Elaine on Seinfeld.

Cute Allie, who happens to be getting married on Friday the 25th.

The babies of the family... I love this picture because Summer is actually smiling!

The Grampp girls... really, the Grampp/Brown/Bourne girls!

John, these lips are for you only!

Boating at Jordanelle

2008-07-21T11:40:00.005-06:00

Since my father-in-law, Brad, sold his beautiful truck, we have not had anything to pull the beautiful boat with this summer. We have not been boating since Lake Mead, which was in May, so we finally borrowed Tom's truck and went up to Jordanelle.

The day started out alright, it was a little overcast... but we were just happy to be on the lake!

It was getting a little more cloudy, and the wind started to pick up a bit. We decided to head back, since none of us had gotten in the water yet and the sun hadn't really been out.

Kyle was lucky and he could hide behind the steering wheel from the wind and rain...

Those of us in the back of the boat weren't as sheltered from the wind and rain!

And this is how our lovely boating day ended... huddling in the boat, while it rained, as Brad went to get the truck.

Of coarse, it hasn't rained for the past month, but the day we decide to go boating, there is a thunderstorm!

Happy Birthday To Me!

2008-07-18T00:06:00.003-06:00

So, I finally turned the big 22 on Monday, July 7th! For all y'all that forgot this year, I forgive you... Just mark your calendars for next year and buy me a really expensive present :) !

We had a fun barbecue with my family and a few freinds. Pictures will be coming soon, once my mom or Jess e-mails them to me!

4th of July

2008-07-10T11:35:00.006-06:00

Kyle and I had a really fun 4th of July weekend. We both love fireworks and barbecues, so this time of year is always fun for us to spend time together! We especially like getting together with family :)

On the 3rd of July, we went to Eaglewood Golf Coarse in North Salt Lake. Kyle, Kelli, and cousin Jaden (Jadie Bug) just goofing off... Jaden loved the sunset!

Kyles aunt Shawndra, aunt Elicia, Grandma Barbara, cousin Averi, and cute mom Shelene.

So, I tried to take come cute pics of us... Kyle just can't take a picture without making a funny face! So as payback, I told him I would put all of the pictures he looks wierd in on the blog :) Even when he is making a wierd face, he is still pretty dang cute :)

See? I made a lot of attempts at taking cute pics. He looks like an old man/woman in this one!

I asked Jade to pose for the camera... this is what she came up with! I think she wanted to show off her "big girl panties".

Ky is going to be such a good Daddy! He swung those girls around for hours!

There goes Averi for a spin...

The girls just love Kyle :)

Finally the fireworks started. It was a pretty good show!

This pic is priceless... from the look on their faces, you can tell it was a good show!

On the actual 4th of July, I had to work the night shift at Thaifoon restaurant. I got off around 9:00, so on impulse we decided to have a late night barbecue! We grilled steaks, had some yummy corn, and ate some really juicy watermelon.

It was a lot of fun just being together and playing with the dogs.

Phebes is looking like a total ragamuffin here! Even though she has wierd teeth and hair in her eyes, her personality makes her the cutest dog ever :)

Kyle's New Talent

2008-06-29T21:38:00.002-06:00

The other day, I decided to buy a waxing kit. Well, I couldn't really wax my own armpits, and I was a little frustrated. Then I looked over at the couch and saw Kyle just chillin, so... Kyle learned a new skill! Really, he is better than the esthetician I usually go to! And to be honest, I think he had a little too much fun with it. We were both laughing hysterically by the end of it. Gotta love it though- it sure beats paying someone $40 a month to inflict pain like that!

Lake Mead

2008-06-15T22:31:00.010-06:00

So, I have been lazy and haven't posted any pics of Lake Mead. We go twice a year, in the spring and fall. We went in May and it was a blast! I think it was the hottest it has ever been- 105 degrees the last day!

I learned how to dive (I was never taught when I was a kid) and Kyle did a lot of cool backflips on the wakeboard. We also lost a little bit of money, thanks to me and my attempts at black jack at the casino in Mesquite :)

Kelli, Ashley and Abbey on the tube... I realized why I really don't like tubing after I was flung off for the fifth time!

Kyle's buddy from work, Casey, and his wife Ashley came with us. It was fun to finally meet Casey and his wife after Kyle had talked about him for the last four months!

Showin off my skills on the wakeboard...

Hangin out with my cute hubbie!

Our friends Brad, Brit and Brandon.

CoNgRaTs, sHaDiE!

2008-06-07T18:09:00.003-06:00

I got to catch up with some friends from high school when I went to Shadie Ghaibi's bridal shower a couple of weeks ago. It was so much fun to see some girls that I don't get to see very often. I am so happy for cute Shadie and her new husband, and I hope that they are crazy happy together! Oh yeah, and I know you can't see it in this picture, but Julie has something new and shiny on her finger, too! That is almost all of my friends from high school that are now little wife-ees!

Officially a Teacher!

2008-05-20T17:40:00.000-06:00

Kyle's pretty Congrats boquet :)

It is official: I will be working at Layton High School this fall teaching English! Finally, I got a good phone call from an interview this time :) Thank you to everyone for supporting me!

Go Lancers!

The Host

2008-05-14T18:04:00.000-06:00

I just finished the book tonight, and I really liked it. If you liked twilight, you HAVE to read this book! It's yet another quick read from Stephenie Meyer that keeps you interested. If you're planning any trips, or just have a lot of time on your hands, go and buy it!

Interviews, Interviews...

2008-04-16T09:15:00.000-06:00

So, I have had a total of 5 interviews and do you want to know how many offers I have recieved? ZERO! I have heard back from four, and I am just praying that the fifth says "Welcome to your new job, you are an AMAZING TEACHER!" Because personally, I am a little discouraged. The last principal talked to me for about 10 minutes and said how impressed he was with me, but they chose a teacher with experience and an endorsement. However, he did mention that I was the next in line and that I was the best out of the rest of them. That made me feel better. So everyone, PLEASE cross your fingers for me! Love you all :)

Just Those Few Weeks

2008-04-15T08:02:00.000-06:00

"Just Those Few Weeks"

For those few weeks-

I had you to myself.

And that seems too short a time

to be changed so profoundly.

In those few weeks-

I came to know you...and to love you.

You came to trust me with your life.

Oh, what a life I had planned for you!

Just those few weeks-

When I lost you.

I lost a lifetime of hopes,

plans, dreams, and aspirations...

A slice of my future simply vanished overnight.

Just those few weeks-

And no "normal" person would cry all night

over a tiny, unfinished baby,

or get depressed and withdraw day after endless day.

No one would, so why am I?

You were those few weeks my little one

you darted in and out of my life too quickly.

But it seems that's all the time you needed

to make my life so much richer

and give me a small glimpse of eternity.

~Susan Erling

The hardest thing to hear...

2008-04-14T07:31:00.000-06:00

So, it has been a long week for Kyle and I. On Tuesday I started to lose the baby, and on Wednesday we had an ultrasound. Dr. Boheen found that the baby hadn't grown at all since our last appointment, and things didn't look right. Its been really hard for us, because we were so excited about having this baby. I guess that my body was just trying to do what was best for the baby, because Dr. Boheen said that it was probably a chromosomal problem. She said that during cell division, some of the cells probably didn't divide right, so the baby couldn't develop normally. I guess this happens all the time, and it doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with us. Although it hurts, we understand that heavenly father doesn't make mistakes and this was supposed to happen. I think that we will definitely become stronger from this experience. We just hope that next time, everything is normal :)

Honeymoon

2008-04-03T18:13:00.000-06:00

WeRe MaRrIeD... So, LeTs PaRtY!

After the wedding, we flew straight to Playa del Carmen at five the next morning. The flight was miserable, probably because we got three hours of sleep and did'nt have any pillows or blankets on the tiny plane. When we finally got to Mexico, it felt like it was well worth the flight! Our hotel was amazing, the food all inclusive, and the beach was awesome. I wish I were there right now! Our favorite part was an excursion we took to a Mayan village, ruins, and an underground cave filled with water.

The pool at our hotel, RIU Palace Riviera Maya

On the beach at the Hotel... White sand, palm trees, blue water... Don't you wish you were there right now?

The lobby of our hotel... I have never stayed in such a fancy hotel! (And probably won't again for a long time!) Thanks Kyle for forking over a few months of your Alpine Home Medical salary for this awesome honeymoon!

Having fun in the jacuzzi at the spa. Kyle is making his Zoolander face!

On the excursion... We ziplined across a lake!

Climbing the ruins in Coba...

WhAt A cUtIe!

Visiting the ruins of Tulum... There is actually a lot of Book of Mormon history here. So cool!

Look at those muscles work! Kyle pretty much paddled the entire way :) I was the designated photographer... Someone's gotta capture the memories, right?

Baby on the way!

2008-04-03T17:50:00.000-06:00

I found out that a little baby was on the way on Kyle's 25th birthday- February 18th, 2008. I was so nervous all day to tell him the news! I bought him a birthday card that said "Happy Birthday, Dad!" He was so surprised, and we both started jumping up and down! We were going out to dinner with both of our families that night, so we made some cupcakes and decorated them with little babies, rattles, pacifiers, and other baby stuff. When I brought out the cupcakes, it took my mom a little while to catch on. Mary and Eddie both got it pretty quickly. My mom started crying, and Shelene was so excited! Both of our families can't wait for the new baby. It will be the first on both sides... well, unless little Baby Grampp beats us! Yes, we found out a few weeks later that Eddie and Mary are expecting also! Our due dates are only a few days apart. We just wish that Eddie and Mary still lived here, so that our babies could play together.

Our Summer in Seattle

2008-04-03T16:53:00.000-06:00

So, our summer in Seattle was our first adventure together. We moved from May to August in 2007 with a summer sales company. The job was a total drag, but we had a blast with all of the young couples and made a lot of new friends! We wish that we could've had a little more time to explore the city, because it really is a beautiful place. We made plenty of trips to Pike's Place Market, Snoqualmie falls, the woods... Even though we were ready to be done with the job, it was a little bittersweet leaving.Hopefully we will be able to make it back someday!

On the Pier in the heart of Seattle... Pretty Close to the Famous Pike's Place Market (where they throw the fish).

On the Fourth of July watching fireworks with some First Line friends... Katrina and Josh, Kyle and I, JJ and Erica, and Kaylee and Jason. The boys worked the entire day, a 12 hour shift!

Hiking down to Snoqualmie Falls. This tree was HUGE. We did this hike about three times, usually on Sundays. It was free, and SO beautiful.

Hanging out with one of the Pig statues... they had different pigs all over the city, and they were all decorated differently. We would always take pictures with them. Later, we realized that it was some sort of charity, and you were supposed to donate money when you took a picture with one of the pigs... Oops!

Phebes in our apartment... See, I told you she was the cutest dog ever! She was my little buddy over the summer. Kyle was gone a lot, so she really kept me company. She also tried to protect me. When people would walk by the apartment, she would sit by the door and bark. I would LOVE to see what a Shih Tzu could do to an intruder. It would be pretty funny to watch!

Kyle and I at Snoqualmie falls. We hopped the fence and hiked all the way to the edge of the rocks. JJ and Josh jumped in... the water was freezing!

August 16, 2006

2008-04-03T16:35:00.000-06:00

Kyle and I got married on August 16th, 2006. The day was completely perfect. It was hard to get married without Kyle's mom and dad, but their support for our decision meant a lot to us. They have always stuck by us in our decisions. I am so lucky to be part of such a great family. And I am so lucky to have such an amazing, cute husband!

Just me and the sista's! If only Allie were there :)

All of our favorite little cousins...

The new and improved Brown family!

Dancing in a wedding gown...